tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-61962024997436265212024-03-13T20:46:59.687-07:00A Chat With MattA place to document conversations with my brother Matt, who has MS.
He can’t write himself any more and I am happy to share his thoughts via this blog!Unknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger16125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6196202499743626521.post-64752664719635367932022-08-30T08:45:00.001-07:002022-08-30T08:45:34.069-07:00Three Years....... <p></p><p class="MsoNormal"><br /><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Three
Years since you left us Matt O. and I feel like after you died, we had the
pandemic and my professional life got crazy and I haven’t had proper time to
grieve you.<o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Today I
listened to you singing The Lord’s Prayer which I have heard hundreds of times
and it’s calming. Then I listened to “You Raise Me Up” and it hit me ….. and the
tears rolled.<o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">I miss
you so much, I miss our talks, I miss your crazy ideas, I miss taking you
treats, I miss it all.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I miss my brother.<o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">I saw a
Facebook post the other day about what MS took from you – it was meant for
people living with MS and I stopped and paused for a moment.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Well MS Took my brother (a father, a husband,
a friend) away. But what did MS Take from Matt? Besides the obvious, it took
his vision, then his mobility, then his spirt and that’s what hurts the most! The
personality that Matt was; larger than life, life of the party, happy, caring,
loving, helpful, hard working, do anything for anybody man that he was. That’s
what it took. <o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">It makes
me sad that the younger generation today didn’t really get to know healthy
Matt. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I sometimes wonder what I am
supposed to learn from life’s events. What is God’s master plan?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I read a book recently, <i>Stranger in the lifeboat</i>
by Mitch Albom and a phrase that has stayed with me: <o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in;"><strong><span style="background: white; color: #111111; font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif; font-weight: normal; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-bidi;">“</span></strong><strong><span style="background: white; color: #111111; font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif; font-weight: normal;">When someone passes, people always ask, ‘Why did God take
them?</span></strong><strong><span style="background: white; color: #111111; font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">’</span></strong><span style="background: white; color: #111111; font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; float: none; font-variant-caps: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; orphans: 2; text-decoration-color: initial; text-decoration-style: initial; text-decoration-thickness: initial; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px;"> A better question would be ‘Why did God give them to
us?’ What did we do to deserve their love, their joy, the sweet moments we
shared?</span><span style="background: white; color: #111111; font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">”<o:p></o:p></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="background: white; color: #111111; font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">The same author’s book <i>Tuesday’s With Morrie</i>
(The inspiration for a “A Chat with Matt” blog) he writes “Death ends a life,
not a relationship”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Grief is a funny
thing. While we know the cliché’ sayings “He’s in a better place….”, “He’s not
suffering….” It still hurts. I know my brother didn’t want to live how he was
living but it doesn’t make it any less painful to lose someone. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I find a peace in remembering all we shared,
the visits, talks and phone calls and before that the choir practices and
family get togethers. <o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="background: white; color: #111111; font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">I am truly grateful for my brother, for the
lessons he taught me, the friendship and support. <br />
Nobody can take away the memories or the blessing that he was.<br />
<br />
So on this day while I recall the date of his passing, I will recall the life
he lived.<br />
Larger than life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And if you know….you
know: <br />
<br />
“What do you feed your babies”?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><br />
“Wide Mouth Frogs”<br />
(lips pursed together) “OH ya don’t say”<o:p></o:p></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiCrJpBstwDy-qnlIOn2yBuG_xiXx1D4BVBszapha-j-sLFJ49az6ODFcJd7dFt2YUHCO6YHYXvZJpCkFn9k9XJe6TvhgHAE4rXXLAsjaiKJUbJa7BldKK-dgBEKInKpcfKur5wtotrvrKWYqNjHNeKn6gT9GVc25wFqbafhpHFhj6VMZzyHGT1cWoN/s1601/mk.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1601" data-original-width="868" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiCrJpBstwDy-qnlIOn2yBuG_xiXx1D4BVBszapha-j-sLFJ49az6ODFcJd7dFt2YUHCO6YHYXvZJpCkFn9k9XJe6TvhgHAE4rXXLAsjaiKJUbJa7BldKK-dgBEKInKpcfKur5wtotrvrKWYqNjHNeKn6gT9GVc25wFqbafhpHFhj6VMZzyHGT1cWoN/s320/mk.jpg" width="173" /></a></div><p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="background: white; color: #111111; font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="background: white; color: #111111; font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Here's to you Matt O.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I love you! <o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="background: white; color: #111111; font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br style="mso-special-character: line-break;" />
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<!--[endif]--><o:p></o:p></span></p><br /><p></p>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6196202499743626521.post-73157535382688693592021-08-30T14:00:00.000-07:002021-08-30T14:00:40.386-07:00It’s been 2 years since Matt passed…..<p style="font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span style="font-family: arial;">I miss my “Chat’s with Matt” – a lot.</span></p><p style="font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><br /><span style="font-family: arial;">
This pandemic would have been very hard on him especially when nursing homes weren’t allowing visitors so in that aspect as my momma always said “The Lord works in mysterious ways”.<br />
This pandemic has been hard on me and I know on a lot of people in a lot of different ways but the nursing home residents that couldn’t have any visitors for such a long time not really a comparison to the challenges it has made me face (mostly just work stuff). Because of the pandemic just several months after Matt’s passing, I feel that I haven’t really grieved his loss; coupled with the fact that I actually “lost” my brother to MS several years ago. </span></p><p style="font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span style="font-family: arial;">He didn’t want to live like he was living as his quality of life had steadily gone downhill over the past several years. We tried so hard to find things, to do things to make ways to give him a sense of purpose and a sense of hope but he didn’t see the joy he gave us just by simply being him and being there. I understand how he felt, because we talked so many times about it. He missed what he “was” and didn’t like what he had “become” and he was angry. When he was denied the disability the first time, he called me, I will never ever forget it, I was in Columbus on a girls shopping trip. He told me “I feel like such a failure”. As if. As if he asked for this. As if he didn’t want to work and provide for his family, as if he didn’t want to see, to walk, to be able to pick things up and eat them on his own (without help or without making a mess.). As if he didn’t want to be whole. I don’t know why Matt had this journey, but he did, maybe to touch the lives he touched. Maybe someone he met learned about M.S. or how to treat M.S. </span></p><p style="font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><br />
If you don’t know about Matt’s journey, he had M.S. (Multiple Sclerosis) and it affected his vision early on and he couldn’t see well. He explained it to me once like double vision. If he stared at something long enough he could focus on it but it took him some time. His other muscles were affected as well and he lost the ability to walk, and his finger/hand dexterity deteriorated (Think about not being on your smart phone---- he could not only not see it, he couldn’t push the right buttons to do things with it) At an M.S. event they took and rubbed Vaseline on goggles to show how vision was affected and a flipper (for swimming) on one foot and a high heel on the other- and that is what It felt like to walk. I asked him about that once and he said it’s like when your foot or arm falls asleep….only it never goes away. </span></p><p style="font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span style="font-family: arial;">I can’t imagine living with that every single day with no hope that it will get better. </span></p><p style="font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><br />
What I remember about a young and healthy Matt was his zest for life and his huge personality, his amazing voice and his sense of humor. Matt was the most caring, giving and loving guys I have ever met. He was SO funny! One year when I was young, divorced, struggling to make ends meet, he bought me a DVD player because we didn’t have one. Before you could live stream anything you wanted, the only way to watch a movie was to rent one or buy one. Another time I was trying to fix my own plumbing problem (Matt was a plumber) and it was my first home with my ex-husband, I decided that I was a plumber’s daughter and I could fix this by myself. So at 9:00 at night (my ex was working) <br />
I decided to take a P Trap off myself and I broke it. It was our only bathroom. I called Matt. He came to my rescue and fixed it that night. This was the type of guy my brother was. There are so many more stories I could tell.</span></p><p style="font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><br />
He was my big brother, my protector, my confidante. Matt and I were the only two (of six) kids left at home when our siblings went off to college, marriage and life. There is a pretty significant age difference between the oldest and youngest (15 years) and I think we all experienced things a little differently because of the age gap. Matt was 4 years older than me, 5 years in school. He was a senior when I was a 7<sup>th</sup> grader. I looked up to him in a way that I cannot describe. </span><span style="font-family: arial;">I was proud to be his little sister!! (I still am)</span><span style="font-family: arial;"><br />
He never judged me, even when he could have (and probably should have) and he was there for me even when I probably didn’t deserve it. <br />
<br />
A big heart, a big voice, a big love. That is how I would describe my brother.<br />
<br />
It’s not just today, the anniversary of his passing, but every day that I think of him.<br />
So when they say “he’s in a better place” – I take comfort in that he is no longer suffering. <br />
I truly hope he is running free in heaven and sitting with my parents and smiling down.</span><br /></p><p style="font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span style="font-family: arial;">If you’ve ever seen the movie Wicked there is a song…..”For Good </span></p><p style="font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span style="font-family: arial;">A few of the Lyrics (and how I feel about Matt O.) </span></p><p style="font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span style="font-family: arial;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span jsname="YS01Ge" style="caret-color: rgb(32, 33, 36); color: #202124; font-family: arial, sans-serif;">I've heard it said</span><br style="caret-color: rgb(32, 33, 36); color: #202124; font-family: arial, sans-serif;" /><span jsname="YS01Ge" style="caret-color: rgb(32, 33, 36); color: #202124; font-family: arial, sans-serif;">That people come into our lives for a reason</span><br style="caret-color: rgb(32, 33, 36); color: #202124; font-family: arial, sans-serif;" /><span jsname="YS01Ge" style="caret-color: rgb(32, 33, 36); color: #202124; font-family: arial, sans-serif;">Bringing something we must learn</span><br style="caret-color: rgb(32, 33, 36); color: #202124; font-family: arial, sans-serif;" /><span jsname="YS01Ge" style="caret-color: rgb(32, 33, 36); color: #202124; font-family: arial, sans-serif;">And we are led</span><br style="caret-color: rgb(32, 33, 36); color: #202124; font-family: arial, sans-serif;" /><span jsname="YS01Ge" style="caret-color: rgb(32, 33, 36); color: #202124; font-family: arial, sans-serif;">To those who help us most to grow</span><br style="caret-color: rgb(32, 33, 36); color: #202124; font-family: arial, sans-serif;" /><span jsname="YS01Ge" style="caret-color: rgb(32, 33, 36); color: #202124; font-family: arial, sans-serif;">If we let them…..</span><br style="caret-color: rgb(32, 33, 36); color: #202124; font-family: arial, sans-serif;" /><span jsname="YS01Ge" style="caret-color: rgb(32, 33, 36); color: #202124; font-family: arial, sans-serif;">And we help them in return</span><br style="caret-color: rgb(32, 33, 36); color: #202124; font-family: arial, sans-serif;" /><span jsname="YS01Ge" style="caret-color: rgb(32, 33, 36); color: #202124; font-family: arial, sans-serif;">Well, I don't know if I believe that's true</span><br style="caret-color: rgb(32, 33, 36); color: #202124; font-family: arial, sans-serif;" /><span jsname="YS01Ge" style="caret-color: rgb(32, 33, 36); color: #202124; font-family: arial, sans-serif;">But I know I'm who I am today</span><br style="caret-color: rgb(32, 33, 36); color: #202124; font-family: arial, sans-serif;" /><span jsname="YS01Ge" style="caret-color: rgb(32, 33, 36); color: #202124; font-family: arial, sans-serif;">Because I knew you…</span></p><p style="font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span jsname="YS01Ge" style="caret-color: rgb(32, 33, 36); color: #202124; font-family: arial, sans-serif;"><br /></span></p><p style="font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><span jsname="YS01Ge" style="caret-color: rgb(32, 33, 36); color: #202124; font-family: arial, sans-serif;">Listen to it by clicking <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TZ0pXUb5jVU" target="_blank">HERE. </a></span></p><p style="font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><br /></p><p style="font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><br /></p><p style="font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal; margin: 0px;"><br /></p>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6196202499743626521.post-51563091082185499272019-09-05T17:06:00.002-07:002019-09-05T17:06:28.862-07:00One Last Chat<div>
What I wouldn't give for one last Chat with Matt. Sure I can still talk to him, but how I would love to have a real conversation with him. I was reading through the old blogs tonight and I realize we started out strong and really slowed down how often we did a blog, although we did have our Facebook Group to update people. Matt loved people. Matt loved his family. Matt loved me. (And I loved Matt.) </div>
<div>
This past week has been a whirlwind and all sort of surreal at this point. We knew the disease would never get better, we know it would get worse but what we did not know is how quickly this would happen. I guess you never know. You never know what any moment will bring and that is why you should live life to its fullest. Never take anything for granted, big or little. It's so cliché to say live every day as if it were your last.... But it's true. What if you don't get the chance to say goodbye to someone, or tell them you love them, or you're sorry or you care or any of a hundred other things....What are you waiting for? Do it today. Life is short. Nobody believes that until they get a little older, a little wiser or they watch a little child grow up. It.Happens.Fast. Don't wait for the time to be right, the time will never be right. You can make excuses or you can make it happen. </div>
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I have a lot of Faith in God. I truly, truly do. Sometimes I don't hear him, and I've been told it's because I'm not quiet enough to listen. (ha ha, I do try) I want a burning bush.... I want a booming voice from the sky. I want to know the why....everything happens for a reason...what is the reason for this? I'm sure one day I will find out. Time does have a way of healing and you can get bitter or you can get better. Time heals, it doesn't forget, but it heals. If you get angry over the bad things that happen you will waste away what is rest of your life. Have Faith. Trust God. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
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I will miss Matt terribly. I will miss our chats over diet pepsi. I will miss knowing he is there. I will miss him calling me to tell me something completely off the wall because he thought of it and I will miss him listening about my day or my family. I will miss hearing how proud he is of me. I will miss him. My brother, my friend, my confidante. He listened, he cared and he understood me in ways that most people do not. I hate that I didn't know our last conversation was our last, when he spoke to me, but I do know the last conversation I had with him alone, just the two of us, I said "I love you" and he mumbled it back. I played music for him and I held his hand and I loved him.</div>
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The showing of support from our family, friends, our community - was truly remarkable. He was loved and respected and that was evident by the amount of people we saw come through that church. </div>
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One of the hardest things for me was watching his children mourn the loss of their father. Matt was 56. Our dad was 55, I was 16 years old. Julia (His youngest) is a little older than I was when my dad died, but I know that emptiness, that feeling of knowing your dad won't be at all your big events....and I understand it. (Julia, I will always be there for you!) Matt was a lot like our dad -Hard worker, great provider, strong family man. Matt's presence much like my fathers was larger than life. The legacy my dad started, Matt carried on.</div>
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They both made a difference in the lives of so many people. <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-DlZgkuJ9uTA/XXGeulvVirI/AAAAAAAAAVM/THASOdkgQjIcxx72lmmkoZbIhuBBDf4mQCEwYBhgL/s1600/difference.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="605" data-original-width="605" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-DlZgkuJ9uTA/XXGeulvVirI/AAAAAAAAAVM/THASOdkgQjIcxx72lmmkoZbIhuBBDf4mQCEwYBhgL/s320/difference.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
I know I'm rambling on now, but I felt the need to write one last blog for Matt (about Matt) and to thank all that supported him.--- visited, prayed, called, wrote or just thought of him through the last several years. We started this because he wanted to tell his story and I promised to do it for him.</div>
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His story has now ended and I know he would also want to thank you.</div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6196202499743626521.post-22666387507504737032019-01-31T15:03:00.000-08:002019-01-31T15:03:02.049-08:00State of the Union ….<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Matt and I had a nice chat today and we decided we haven’t done a blog post in a while.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">So we decided on a “State of the Union” or “State of Matt O.” address! </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Matt has had a rough go of it with a fall right after Christmas and a UTI that really zapped him of his energy or as he said “It really kicked my butt.” </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I asked if he had anything to say and he told me that he knew if anyone could put it into words that I could. (ha ha) but he wanted to say “Don’t take your health for granted, when you are young you think you’ll live forever and you just never know when something will happen.” Simple things, like moving your legs…which he can not do. He did have some therapy today and that always tires him out. He was however in good spirits and was one of the best visits we’ve had in weeks. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">We talked about our mom and how she fought after her cancer diagnosis and with her rheumatoid arthritis, she lived with chronic pain. I can’t imagine how Matt must feel with the MS, the limited vision and aches and pains. They say that the nerve pain is like if your foot falls asleep only it’s not just your foot and it never goes away. He feels better, though and his spirits are lifted.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">He absolutely LOVES visitors, even if you can only stay 10 minutes, it perks him up like you wouldn’t believe. He recently had some former co-workers visit and he just loved it. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">You don’t have to bring anything just your presence is what he desires. If you feel compelled to bring something, he loves diet pepsi and reese cups! </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Matt loves his grandchildren so much! His legacy! </span><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-2ahGtp94KKg/XFN9CdeGj0I/AAAAAAAAATI/kEl3DvqiVYMYIffEk0gEiNilopXq2VSYACLcBGAs/s1600/IMG_9566.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1257" data-original-width="1600" height="251" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-2ahGtp94KKg/XFN9CdeGj0I/AAAAAAAAATI/kEl3DvqiVYMYIffEk0gEiNilopXq2VSYACLcBGAs/s320/IMG_9566.JPG" width="320" /></a></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"> Pictured is a picture that his daughter Katie made with her children Ellie and Connor. Little Connor looks just like “Pops” (And I see some of Matt in little Carsyn as well) and he lights up when he talks about them! He said “They are something else.” He is so proud of his family! You can just hear the pride in his voice when he talks about them all! Love Never Melts! And Matt O. is LOVED! </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">In conclusion Matt would just like to thank those that come and see him and his family for being there for him through the ups and downs! 2018 was a rough one, but he’s feeling better and hopes 2019 brings him more ups than downs. It’s hard to maintain a positive attitude all of the time and not be angry at the illness, however he’s trying to find the positive.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Please continue to keep Matt O. in your thoughts and prayers! </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">He is at Bellevue Care Center, Room 103. (Corner of Flat Rock and Gardner Roads) </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Love,</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Kellie…. for Matt O. </span><br />
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<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6196202499743626521.post-46116395897892539472017-03-12T12:16:00.000-07:002017-03-12T12:17:55.233-07:00Thrill of Victory - Agony of Defeat<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I know some people are too young to remember ABC “Wide World of Sports” and they had the montage “The Thrill of Victory and the Agony of Defeat” and they showed this ski jump fall by Vinko Bogataj </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x7frGJf77AA">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x7frGJf77AA</a> (Shown in the first 30 seconds) </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">This is how Pastor John started his sermon today. The reason for the fall…"<span style="background-color: white; color: #252525;">Midway down the inrun for his jump, Bogataj realised that the conditions had made the ramp too fast. He attempted to lower his </span><a class="mw-redirect" href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Center_of_gravity" style="background-image: none; text-decoration: none;" title="Center of gravity"><span style="color: black;">center of gravity</span></a><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #252525;"> and stop his jump, but instead lost his balance completely and rocketed out of control off the end of the inrun, tumbling and flipping wildly, and crashing through a light retaining fence near a crowd of spectators before coming to a halt. “ (wikipedia)</span></span></span><br />
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<span style="color: #252525; font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;">Pastor John talked about how you react to a changes in your path and he had a really great sermon today and I just couldn’t help but think of Matt, the entire time. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #252525;">If Vikno Bogataj hadn’t changed his path, he likely would have been killed doing that jump if he hadn’t adjusted his path, instead he received a concussion and a broken ankle. We have to “adjust our sails” so to speak to the changing winds in our lives and do something differently, not just lay down and die. Things don’t always go as planned and we have to learn to adjust to the roadblocks in life. MS changed Matt’s path but his life is not over, just life as he once knew it. He once was </span></span><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #252525;">a hard working plumber/pipefitter at Ford Motor Co, active in his community, father to four and husband to Cindy. And now he’s pretty much confined to a wheel chair. (He can transfer from chair to bed and back to chair) His dexterity has deteriorated a lot and has a hard time gripping things (including a fork or spoon) and he tries his best to maintain what is left of his </span></span><span style="color: #252525;">independence. It is hard and you can’t help but wonder “why”? Matt doesn’t want sympathy, he just wants everyone to know he can’t help it. March is MS Awareness month and while he told me “I”m very well aware” and he wants others to know his journey through MS. </span></span><br />
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<span style="color: #252525; font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I told him I thought that God brought him to where he is for a reason. He is there to be a light to others and he truly enjoys the other residents. He enjoys getting to know them and was recently voted President of Resident council, although we hear the vote was really close and there may be a re-vote. (Voter Fraud? ha ha-- Matt O for President! Making Bellevue Care Center Great Again!) (I am not sure all the details of this, but would certainly campaign for my brother if I could) Matt enjoys very much selling candy bars to raise money for a monthly pizza party! He loves his pizza and diet pepsi! </span><br />
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<span style="color: #252525; font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">He told me he loves getting to know the other residents and he even can tell you things about the caregivers - like one of the activity girls played basketball in college. He still has a love for people that doesn’t end and he truly enjoys getting to know people. </span><br />
<span style="color: #252525; font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">He has been tired lately and even a little depressed. He’s adjusted the best he can to a “new normal”. He misses being an active part of society. </span><br />
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<span style="color: #252525; font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">My sister, Robin and I are part of a group called “IRUN4” where you are paired with a disabled person and dedicate your runs (or walks) to, we each have a buddy! I decided to sign up Matt for a buddy, and he was just paired with Brandon and we are getting to know Brandon, he’s already sent us pictures of a couple of runs and Matt does his “laps” around the nursing home. It may be just the inspiration Matt needs to get out there and keep moving! </span><br />
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<span style="color: #252525; font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">We haven’t updated in a while and Matt didn’t have a lot to say today but Pastor John’s sermon really impacted me And I couldn’t wait share that story with him and felt it was a good time for an update. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="color: #252525;">It’s hard some days when you can’t cheer Matt up and there is no magic “thing” to say or do. This quote pretty much sums it up: </span><span style="background-color: white; text-align: justify;">When your heart is breaking for someone who is broken, but your words can’t reach them and your love can’t save them, ask the angels to go where you cannot. To whisper into their heart what their ears can’t hear: “We will not give up on you. Don’t give up on yourself.” — </span><a href="https://www.amazon.com/Running-Water-Sky-Sandra-Kring-ebook/dp/B00W5QH1L8/ref=as_li_ss_tl?ie=UTF8&linkCode=sl1&tag=thebookconn0e-20&linkId=b3d93600b6e08970b69b93477f6f6fe0" style="border: 0px; color: #0071bb; margin: 0px; outline: none; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">Sandra Kring</a></span><br />
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<span style="color: #252525; font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">If you get a chance, stop by and see him! He’s at Bellevue Care Center in Bellevue, Room 107, it’s on the corner of Flatrock and Gardner Roads just south of Route 20. (If you turn south by Family Video it’s the next intersection) </span><br />
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<span style="color: #252525; font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">If you haven’t signed up for the MS Walk yet it is May 6th in Sandusky. </span><br />
<span style="color: #252525; font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Here is the link to our team - come and walk with us or donate or both! (Donations not required) All money goes to the MS Society. </span><br />
<span style="color: #252525; font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><a href="http://main.nationalmssociety.org/site/TR?team_id=510352&fr_id=28794&pg=team" target="_blank">Walk for Matt O</a></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #252525; font-family: sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 14px;"><br /></span></span></span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6196202499743626521.post-13026533198396481702016-09-22T17:00:00.000-07:002016-09-22T17:00:42.741-07:00Groundhog Day<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Matt’s life now is like the movie Groundhog Day where every day sort of seems the same and just not the life he thought he would be living at 54 years of age. (Matt just turned 54). </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">He has good days and bad days and the bad days he seems pretty bummed out about life.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Of course he’s alone with his thoughts while the rest of us our out living our lives, working, making a living, etc…. and don’t get me wrong, he understands that….but for him, he’s stuck in a nursing home. It’s easy to feel forgotten, unwanted and like a burden - and he does. He has some friends there and the staff has been good to him, but what he’s really struggling with is to find a purpose. What is his purpose for living a life with MS, confined to bed or a wheel chair? He has been sort of down lately and I encourage any of you reading to take the time to have a real life “Chat with Matt” and go visit. He loves visitors. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">It helps distract from the reality of what “is”.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">He is frustrated by not being able to be a “real” husband to his wife and he is angry at all this disease has taken from him….his job, his house, his ability to see, to drive, to walk, and even sometimes to talk.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">He knows he messes things up and he gets frustrated. He says thing he doesn’t mean and means to say things he doesn’t. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">He gets frustrated when he spills drinks or food. I told him he can’t help it and he knows that too.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">If you’ve ever had a pinched nerve, think about how that feels, and think about all your nerves being pinched - that’s how he feels. Some days are worse than others but the sensation to feel the grasp on a can of pop or a sandwich, it just isn’t there and he literally can’t help it.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">He wanted to talk tonite….to vent….and I just let him.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I told him it sucks and there is no other way to put it but to say it sucks and I wish I had magic words to make it all better.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I told him it’s ok to be mad and hurt and all of that.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I don’t know why he got this disease, but he did and he has to take it one day at a time, even one minute at a time. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">It’s times like this that I feel helpless.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">As much as I want to make it better for him, I can’t.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">There is no magic wand to wave to make it all better.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I told him Matt, you can’t change what is, but you still have a lot to be thankful for, a wife and kids and grandkids now! You have had a great life until this happened and you have to focus on the positive and not dwell on the negative. He said “It’s hard”. I tell him I know…but I really don’t know. I have no idea what it’s like to be in his situation and I try to be compassionate and understanding and patient and kind and I listen. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">His purpose lately has been to get a pizza party at the nursing home for the residents so he started selling suckers - he wanted to sing for money but they told him he had to give people something tangible for money - and he’s raised like $70 - and it gives him something to focus on - and that’s what he needs- something to focus on. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">We haven’t done an update lately because we really try to stay positive but the reality of this illness is there is a lot of negative and I only hope that I bring a little happiness to his life and to his day.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">When I left to night he said “I love you so much” and I said “I love you so much, back” and I do love him more than words could ever say - my big brother, my mentor, my friend, my hero. </span><br />
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<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6196202499743626521.post-70390276862645242582016-06-09T17:57:00.000-07:002016-06-09T17:57:24.263-07:00It’s a Small World After All….<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">We haven’t updated in a while and Matt wanted everyone to know he’s at the Bellevue Care Center, Room 107. It’s at the corner of Flatrock and Gardner Roads in Bellevue, OH, south of Route 20. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">He loves visitors! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">He told me today that being in the nursing home, he realizes how small the world really is. He knows people that are also residents there and many of the employees -- he knows someone they know and he said “It really is a small world” and it’s just “really cool” to talk to so many people. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">What do they say, Six Degrees of Separation? (The theory that anyone on the planet can be connected to another though six or less people.) I think he’s proved that in talking to people there!!</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">It’s been a bit of a roller coaster since he got settled in, while his “world” stays the same for the most part, changes are happening all around and he sometimes feels very isolated from the outside world.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">MS has taken so much from him already and now he’s faced with the reality of the house he and Cindy called home, their little “O” Farm on Dining Road, will be sold. Not an easy decision for sure, but way too much for Cindy to keep up and certainly understandable. Matt said he gets that. Matt said “My world turned upside down”. It’s a lot to absorb, but he’s learning to accept it and while he understands it, it’s hard on the heart. He told me “I’m trying to keep a good head on my shoulders, I had a few bad days, but trying to stay upbeat and positive.” <i>(Personally, I think that it’s a big reality to him that he won’t go “home” again…and that’s a tough pill to swallow). </i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Matt’s had a few outings while he’s been there and really enjoyed the visit to the Trout Club. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">(He worked there when he was younger) and really enjoyed telling stories about that. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">One of the very awesome things is that they started an MS Support group last month and they will have another meeting on on June 22 at 10:30 a.m. He said the Activities Director was the one that started it for him! If you are around that day, please come and show Matt O. your support! (It’s at the Care Center)</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">All in all he is adjusting to life in the nursing home, he’s getting therapy, and said everyone has been very good to him. He really likes all of the people. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">He loves to have a diet pepsi and chat - It’s kind of “our thing” </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">He said he likes the blog because “People want to hear what I have to say, I don’t really get it, but they seem to like it!” (You BET they do Matt O!) He really loves the comments and we all will read them to him so please….comment away!! (If you haven’t done so,<a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/526487324195513/" target="_blank"> join our Facebook Group)</a> </span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6196202499743626521.post-28687750173325368872016-04-15T17:29:00.000-07:002016-04-15T17:29:17.113-07:00Home is where the heart is…...<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Matt is getting settled in to the nursing home. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Bellevue Care Center</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #222222; font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">1 Aldrich Sq.</span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Bellevue, OH 4481</span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">(Corner of Flatrock and Gardner Roads)</span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">He would love visitors!</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;">It reminded me tonite of how social Matt has always been. Our brother Paul was leaving when I got there, his neighbor across the hall a young girl (29) came by and I got to meet her and then our old neighborhood and one of our dad’s closest friends Jim Yantz came by to visit. Matt thoroughly enjoyed that! They talked about people they know and life in Bay View! (Where we grew up) It’s amazing the names he remembers when I can not! </span></span><br />
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<span style="color: #222222; font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;">More importantly…..we had ice cream! Butter Pecan - Toft’s the best! He loved it!</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;">And he took a selfie with me :)</span></span><br />
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<span style="color: #222222; font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;">Matt said everyone at the care center has been so nice and he’s getting to know people and know his way around. He said he knows life as he once knew it is over, but he will make the best of this. He likes the stimulation it provides and it’s motivating to keep moving. He said again how he didn’t ask for this disease, and he can’t help how much has been taken away from him (vision, ability to walk and be independent)… </span></span><br />
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;">We don’t understand the “why” but can’t dwell on it, it is what it is. Acceptance would be a good word for it. The “new normal” is something he will adjust to. He does love seeing people and talking to them. He’s getting to know people and I saw signs of Matt O from high school - caring and compassionate to the other residents, chatting, listening to their story and sharing his own. </span></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">If you knew Matt in high school, he was super popular and I can totally see that happening here!</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">He also said he’s feeling good and he was very upbeat! </span><br />
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;">He was very excited about seeing all his kids last night and is really looking forward to the grandchildren that are due in July and October! One of Matt’s tag lines “It was pretty cool!” He’s very proud of his kids and he gets a little spark when he talks about them. </span></span><br />
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<span style="color: #222222; font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;">When I left he was watching the Indians and we left each other with a “Go Tribe</span>”</span><br />
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;">He loves hearing the comments people people leave… a LOT and he’d love for his friends to visit him! He’s in room 107.</span></span><br />
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<span style="color: #222222; font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;">The MS Walk is coming up May 7 - if you haven’t donated or if you want to walk….. I<a href="http://main.nationalmssociety.org/site/TR/Walk/OHAWalkEvents?team_id=469203&pg=team&fr_id=27338" target="_blank">nfo is HERE </a></span></span><br />
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">and if you aren’t on our <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/526487324195513/" target="_blank">Facebook Group - it is here</a></span><br />
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<span style="color: #222222; font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span></span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6196202499743626521.post-42625648462018374432016-04-04T17:49:00.000-07:002016-04-04T17:52:58.649-07:00MS has taught me…...I recently found a Facebook post on a page I like called<a href="https://www.facebook.com/LiftMS/?fref=ts" target="_blank"> Lift MS.</a><br />
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They asked you to fill in the blank. MS Has taught me…..<br />
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I was touched by some of the comments I read from others with MS and shared some with Matt and also asked him to fill in the blank.<br />
He said MS has taught him “To Live”….<br />
Even though he lives in a much different way than he ever imagined and there are days he wants to give up…. He said “It’s hard, ya know?”<br />
And he thought it was very cool to hear what others had to say and he said he can relate to it all.<br />
He also said there are times he wishes he could “blame somebody” -- but it’s "nobody’s fault.” <br />
He said all he can do is his best and he tries, and he doesn’t “want to be a pain in the butt.”<br />
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Matt is also very excited about Team O and the MS Walk. We have raised over $1300 for our Team and have 26 registered team members! At our Coffee Hour at church we raised over $200 and Matt is VERY Thankful to all who came and all who donated either online or at coffee hour. (Our church family is amazing!)<br />
March was MS awareness month and he can’t stress enough how important it is to raise awareness.<br />
He said it’s “So cool” that so many people are rallying around him!<br />
<a href="http://main.nationalmssociety.org/site/TR/Walk/OHAWalkEvents?team_id=469203&pg=team&fr_id=27338" target="_blank">You can Join Team O. HERE </a><br />
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MS is hard he said, “it sucks”. He said he’s really does’t have any pain like others do, but he’s tired all of the time and the lack of mobility is just hard. When eating, he said he chokes a lot and he doesn’t like that he make a mess, but he really can’t help it, and he feels bad, even embarrassed by it.<br />
He said “just everything is hard”. He said he knows it’s important to do his exercises and even though he can’t do a lot, he knows it helps keep his joints loose and can only do what he can but to everyone it’s important to “keep moving!”<br />
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Just a reminder you can keep up with Matt O. at our Facebook page <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/526487324195513/" target="_blank">“A Chat with Matt” </a><br />
Just hit “Join Group” and we will add you.<br />
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As always Matt looks forward to hearing comments either here or on the Facebook page and if you can’t do any of that, you can email me, <a href="mailto:kelliekenniston@yahoo.com">kelliekenniston@yahoo.com</a> and I will be sure to share them with him!<br />
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Thank you for your support! (Special Thanks to Melanie Boyd for the decorations at coffee hour!)<br />
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<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-hUlLSxYDRxA/VwMLIGYmZEI/AAAAAAAAANA/W3ncJVuaolcB2Q2-hFi0QNAdhGukLtS2A/s1600/DSC_7151.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-hUlLSxYDRxA/VwMLIGYmZEI/AAAAAAAAANA/W3ncJVuaolcB2Q2-hFi0QNAdhGukLtS2A/s320/DSC_7151.jpg" width="213" /></a></div>
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<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6196202499743626521.post-88718370677827583172016-03-14T16:44:00.003-07:002016-03-14T16:44:50.337-07:00Just Tired<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Matt has not had a good week. He’s been pretty depressed.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Your words of encouragement and kindness really mean a lot to him. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I asked him what was going on and he said “I’m just so tired.” </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">He also said he’s tired of being tired and it’s “just this disease.”</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">He told me “everything about it is hard, it’s hard to carry on when you can’t do anything by yourself."</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">He went out to dinner recently with my sisters and aunt and he said it’s so hard when you need help to eat and he doesn’t want to “bother anyone.” I told him I hope he knew we didn’t mind helping him and he said he knew that but he just really “doesn’t want to be a burden.” </span><span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">He said he knows we don’t mind, he just really wishes he could do it himself.</span><br />
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Pictured Kellie and Matt on Christmas Day 2015</div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">More than anything I wish I could wave a magic wand and make him better. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Like anyone with a chronic illness, he has good days and bad days, but lately he’s had more bad than good. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">We talked about our Coffee Hour at church this week and he is really looking forward to that. </span><span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">He said “I’ll be at church, too.” </span><br />
<span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">Sunday March 20, 2016.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Church starts at 10 a.m.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Coffee Hour Following at:</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Congregational UCC</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">205 Main Street</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Castalia, OH 44824</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">(The white church by the duck pond)</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">If you are available, please rally around Matt and show him you care!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I think it will do him a world of good to get out and see people!</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">March is MS Awareness month and we wanted to share some of the symptoms of MS:</span><br />
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<b>Pain areas: </b>in the back or eyes</div>
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<b>Pain circumstances: </b>can occur in the back due to head nod or with eye movement</div>
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<b>Tremor: </b>can occur during precise movements, in the hands, or limbs</div>
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<b>Muscular: </b>cramping, difficulty walking, inability to rapidly change motions, involuntary movements, muscle paralysis, muscle rigidity, muscle weakness, problems with coordination, stiff muscles, clumsiness, muscle spasms, or overactive reflexes</div>
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<b>Whole body: </b>fatigue, dizziness, heat intolerance, poor balance, vertigo, or weakness</div>
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<b>Urinary: </b>excessive urination at night, leaking of urine, persistent urge to urinate, or urinary retention</div>
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<b>Sensory: </b>pins and needles, abnormality of taste, or uncomfortable tingling and burning</div>
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<b>Visual: </b>blurred vision, double vision, or vision loss</div>
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<b>Mood: </b>anxiety or mood swings</div>
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<b>Speech: </b>slurred speech or impaired voice</div>
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<b>Also common: </b>acute episodes, constipation, depression, difficulty swallowing, difficulty thinking and understanding, headache, heavy legs, numbness, numbness of face, rapid involuntary eye movement, sleep deprivation, tongue numbness, or difficulty raising the foot</div>
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Matt said it’s safe to say he’s experienced them all and it’s just so hard to explain. </div>
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Please join us in walking for a cure - Walk MS in Sandusky <a href="http://main.nationalmssociety.org/site/TR?team_id=469203&fr_id=27338&pg=team" target="_blank">CLICK HERE</a></div>
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If you haven’t joined our Facebook Page, a page to leave a note or thought<u><a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/526487324195513/" target="_blank">: Click Here</a></u></div>
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Not everyone can leave a comment here and that is one of the reasons we made the Facebook page.</div>
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If you’d like to send a card to Matt - I know Cindy would read them to him:</div>
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Matt Orshoski</div>
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11311 Dining Road</div>
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Bellevue, OH 44811</div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6196202499743626521.post-70019123380603960612016-03-06T16:39:00.001-08:002016-03-06T16:39:47.208-08:00Breakfast of ChampionsMy weekly ritual on Saturday mornings is to meet my sister Robin and Cousin Sue, we go to Weight Watchers and then have (a healthy) breakfast after. This week we went to Berardi’s because it’s close to where the meeting is and we like it. To our surprise we walked in to see Matt O. and his high school buddies!<br />
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<a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-fKaCPk8E-Mk/VtzH2VDP5GI/AAAAAAAAALs/PsN6mCBi2WE/s1600/IMG_6933.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-fKaCPk8E-Mk/VtzH2VDP5GI/AAAAAAAAALs/PsN6mCBi2WE/s320/IMG_6933.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
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Matt O. with (Left side) Mike Kuns, Larry Felske, Tom Barnes and Right side (Sue and Robin) Don Pfeil, James Schaufler, Jeff Warren) It was such a nice surprise and it’s so nice of them to do this for Matt! Matt told me he loves getting together with them!</div>
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Then today, we celebrated our oldest brother Paul’s birthday and breakfast out again!</div>
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<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-wNhm7JvBqy4/VtzIalJjG6I/AAAAAAAAAL0/49X442ZwFH4/s1600/IMG_7029.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-wNhm7JvBqy4/VtzIalJjG6I/AAAAAAAAAL0/49X442ZwFH4/s320/IMG_7029.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
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Pictured Matt O, Robin, (me)Kellie, Dorene and the birthday boy Paul. </div>
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We went to Bay Bell, in Bay View, where we grew up and it’s like going to Cheers….where everybody knows your name! Matt said he loves just sitting and talking and reminiscing.</div>
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We KNOW our mom would be so proud to see her kids together. Only missing Todd O. (He lives in Georgia) but Paul took care of that and photoshopped him in :)</div>
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<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-SDdKwQhJtSI/VtzJM4MOuCI/AAAAAAAAAMA/dVKXUz1IlsY/s1600/12841371_1156523837721525_5361015114401819429_o.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="184" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-SDdKwQhJtSI/VtzJM4MOuCI/AAAAAAAAAMA/dVKXUz1IlsY/s320/12841371_1156523837721525_5361015114401819429_o.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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Todd plans on being here for Walk MS and all six of us will be there to support Matt O.</div>
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Matt says “I can’t wait!”</div>
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Matt’s slowed down this week and the very real possibility of not being able to live at home is a reality that he is ready to face. He recognizes he needs more constant care than he can get at home. He said he can’t really explain it but “I’ve slowed down a lot”. He said notices it in his speech and his memory and he knows “I should remember things that I don’t.” </div>
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Matt gets around ok in the wheelchair but the risk of falling is warranted since he’s fallen twice and broke a hip and an ankle in the last couple of years. He also has lost a lot of his finger dexterity and trouble gripping things, even to eat. We talked about that a bit and he said it’s ok, because he’d be around people and still “get to see everyone”. </div>
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Matt loves this blog and his way of connecting to everyone and loves hearing the comments that everyone leaves! </div>
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I was telling Matt about Pastor John’s sermon today and I’m sure it’s not the whole message but what I took away from it is about knowing your worth. When you’re young and vibrant you know what you have to offer the world but as you age or get sick you know longer have that same “worth”. Pastor John said “You don’t know your value, if nobody takes you seriously.” This really just resonated with me and I thought about Matt and how his body doesn’t do what it once did. John also compared it to a sports hero that everyone is cheering for - while they are winning- but when he starts to lose the cheering stops, sometimes even the boo-ing begins. I told Matt I wanted him to know how much he is worth to me! Even though he can’t do the things he once did, he’s still here for a reason and I don’t know why God gave him this journey but He did and we need to learn from it and if even one person reading this blog gets something from it, then it’s all been worthwhile. </div>
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He said “I know, Kell, I know.” I’m always here cheering for you Matt and TEAM O is ready to walk for you- raise awareness about MS and maybe just maybe someday they will find a cause and a cure!</div>
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Join US for the Walk! May 7th - <a href="http://main.nationalmssociety.org/site/TR?team_id=469203&fr_id=27338&pg=team" target="_blank">Sign up HERE</a></div>
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You don’t have to buy a shirt but if you’d like to, <a href="http://www.mywalkgear.com/Personalized-Multiple-Sclerosis-Hero-T-Shirt-34161X.aspx?source=froogle&kw=34161X&utm_medium=feed&utm_source=googleproducts&utm_term=34161X&utm_campaign=MS+Tshirts" target="_blank">you can do that HERE</a></div>
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<img border="0" height="320" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-zwiGA4UiU-c/VtzM8BLwJXI/AAAAAAAAAMU/MpZMoxi_hRw/s320/12728914_10153999282498410_6804791531165682206_n.jpg" width="240" /></div>
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Finally if you haven’t joined our Facebook Group…..Please do! <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/526487324195513/" target="_blank">Click HERE to do that.</a></div>
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Team O. is having a “Coffee Hour” at church on Sunday March 20, following worship at Congregational UCC - Worship at 10, Coffee Hour following (Around 11 a.m.) Matt will be there for some real live chatter!</div>
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I can’t thank you all enough for the support, the comments and the prayers.</div>
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<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6196202499743626521.post-9032531138485648072016-02-28T17:34:00.000-08:002016-02-28T17:38:08.563-08:00Acceptance<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-zAmafWz-XoE/VtOeQDa27nI/AAAAAAAAALY/y36b4zlPYek/s1600/12771902_10209077113234466_6361341506879165845_o.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-zAmafWz-XoE/VtOeQDa27nI/AAAAAAAAALY/y36b4zlPYek/s320/12771902_10209077113234466_6361341506879165845_o.jpg" width="296" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">This week Matt and I talked about a lot of different things.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Accepting this disease has been difficult for him. He said he was 23 when they first suspected he had MS and how he wishes he had paid more attention to what the doctors said then. But he said “I was young and thought I was invincible.” When Matt was 16 he had a really bad concussion from playing football and it wasn’t until He and Cindy had infertility issues that he saw an endocrinologist. The doctors think that the concussion caused his pituitary gland "to snap." With the help of the doctors, obviously they fixed the infertility problems! He thinks it (the concussion)all played a part in his illness, and damage to his brain. He said the disease didn’t really start to hit him until he was 47. (He’s 53 now) I asked him what he misses most about what he could do before and he said “Walk”, “I really miss that." He said it’s so hard for him to go places and “get around” and “I have to go to the bathroom a lot and knowing where a restroom is”…." sometimes it’s just easier to stay home”. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">He told me again of how quickly the disease can change things and how “the reality just hits you.” </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">The struggle is real. “Learn what you can, while you can” he told me, because "you don’t always have the time you think you will. “ </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">We talked about how young our dad was when he passed, he was 55. I asked Matt about his Faith and if he believed that God was still there for him and he said “Oh Yeah”. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">He said he’s not ready to meet God yet, but he knows his own death is inevitable. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Matt said he’s so grateful for his large family, because we look out for one another and having a big family is “really cool.” Family history is so important and he’s thankful for our sister Dorene who traces those family roots and documents things. “That’s why it’s important to listen to older people, because they’ve been there." He said “we just don’t think to ask questions.” We think there will always be time, but there will not always be time. It’s hard to believe we are becoming those older people now, leaving our legacy to our children. After our mom died, I found where she had started her own autobiography and hearing her memories in her own words, was a gift that she left us - but how much better it would have been to have those conversations with her. We talked about our mother and he said how he wishes he could have “just one more day to talk to her”, and how much he loved her and missed her and that we grew up in “great times.”</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">That is why Matt likes this blog, to talk and remember and hopefully impart some knowledge and wisdom to his children. “I’ve been in their shoes, I know exactly what they are going through.” He also said that he would “never tell them anything to hurt them, I really just want to help.” </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">We talked about things like technology, the technology we’ve seen change in our lifetime….think of what our parents saw! Matt remember his first cell phone was so big, in a bag and he thought he was “so cool”. Remember the VCR - you know those old VHS Tapes? Yeah, we remember the first VCR we had and how in AWE our dad was. “Oh man”, Matt said… “He didn’t even know how to use it.” Remember the old TV Antenna? Matt talked about how dad got that so he could get better reception to watch sports on TV. (Hmmm….guess THAT runs in the family after all) Heck, I remember when we got cable and had a remote…before that Matt and Todd would yell for me to come and change the channel, even if I wasn’t in the living room! (See Cindy, that remote thing goes way back….) </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">When we are young, we think we’ll always be young, but life has a way of happening and we age and with that comes all of the things this game of life throws at you. Matt’s big curveball in life has been MS, and “MS SUCKS” he said. “I love diet pepsi, but now I can’t even open the can and I spill it all over, it’s just so frustrating.” He reiterated that it’s so important to do your exercises and how he wished he had done more when he was younger. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">You can’t dwell on the past and what was, you have to deal with the here and now and he knows that. He’s accepted he is where he is in life, in the progression of his disease and he just wants to tell his story and thoughts. As long as Matt has a story to tell, I will listen and share. I’ve always looked up to my big brother and I always will! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Matt enjoys all of the comments very much! He also is super excited about the MS Walk that is coming up on May 7. We have over 20 people signed up for “Team O”! If you can join us that day please do! <a href="http://main.nationalmssociety.org/site/TR/Walk/OHAWalkEvents?team_id=469203&pg=team&fr_id=27338" target="_blank">Sign up HERE</a>. If you can’t walk and want to donate to help find a cure for this disease…every little bit helps! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Our Facebook Group also gives a place to leave a message that we can read to Matt as some people had trouble commenting on the blog. <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/526487324195513/" target="_blank">Click Here to Join. </a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">We are also hosting a coffee hour at church on March 20 after worship service and Matt will be there for a real live “Chat with Matt”! March is MS awareness month and “Team O” will be on hand to serve donuts, coffee and conversation! Congregational UCC in Castalia, OH. Worship at 10 a.m., Coffee Hour following (Around 11 a.m.)</span><br />
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6196202499743626521.post-52024766614588133742016-02-20T19:35:00.000-08:002016-02-22T15:39:13.862-08:00Thank you for being a friend…..This week Matt wanted to take some time to thank people for their support and encouragement.<br />
This blog has really meant a lot to him and the comments are so encouraging!!<br />
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He told me he really wanted to thank Ford Motor Company and the UAW for all they did for him.<br />
The support through the process of medically retiring, and “just keeping everything straight."<br />
He enjoyed his career at Ford very much. Matt is a journeyman plumber/pipefitter. When the disease got to the point he could no longer work, he received a lot of support from his coworkers and management an he is truly grateful!<br />
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He also wanted to thank all the medical professionals, Dr. Kuns locally and Dr. Boissey at the Cleveland Clinic Mellen Center. He said “She’s a peach” and he would like for me to meet her some day. (I would like that too!) He really has enjoys his therapists from Firelands also and told me “They are all pretty cool.” This week while he was having therapy he called me and put his therapist Aleta on the phone so I could tell her how to get to the blog. (Did I mention how proud he is of this???) He said Courtney and Michelle are pretty cool too, and he reminded me again “Do your exercises!” <br />
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Matt said he can’t say enough how much his family means to him. He said he could never do it without their support. His kids are starting to fly the coop so there is only Julia at home now with him and Cindy but he appreciates ALL they all do for him.<br />
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He looks forward to visits and dinner with his sisters and he likes catching up with his brothers on the phone and hearing about Paul’s latest visits around the country. (Promoting his books.)<br />
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Matt said he loves to talk to people and he’d love to hear from anyone if they’d like to stop and visit you can leave a message here or leave a message for Cindy or Kellie. (email <a href="mailto:kelliekenniston@yahoo.com">kelliekenniston@yahoo.com</a>) Matt said he’d love to talk to anyone else with MS that may be going through the same thing (or similar)! He just wants people to know what he’s been through! <br />
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He is also looking forward to the MS Walk and excited to hear about people joining Team O!<br />
<a href="http://main.nationalmssociety.org/site/TR/Walk/OHAWalkEvents?team_id=469203&pg=team&fr_id=27338" target="_blank">You can do that HERE. Just click “Join Team O” </a>and if you don’t want to fundraise, (you can over ride the monetary amount to $0) it is NOT mandatory. <i>We want to raise awareness! </i><br />
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Don’t forget about our <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/526487324195513/" target="_blank">Facebook Group </a>…. just click <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/526487324195513/" target="_blank">“Join Group”-</a> we read comments to him and he calls me to see if there is “anything new”!<br />
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We will have some more blogs coming up and I personally want to thank everyone for the support. It absolutely brightens his day and to be honest it’s been great for me to do something for my brother who has ALWAYS been there for me. If you have a story about Matt O. from when you were either in school, work, or just knew each other….please feel free to share! <br />
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<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6196202499743626521.post-11096292400352221072016-02-13T18:59:00.001-08:002016-02-13T18:59:36.379-08:00In the blink of an eye….<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Let me start by inviting everyone to join TEAM O in the fight to cure MS!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">We have a team formed and are walking in the MS Walk on Saturday May 7th, in Sandusky, Ohio.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Join, walk with us, or donate to find a cure! (No amount is too small!) </span><br />
<a href="http://main.nationalmssociety.org/site/TR/Walk/OHAWalkEvents?team_id=469203&pg=team&fr_id=27338" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Click HERE to learn more </span></a><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">You don’t have to, but if you’d like to order a shirt you can do so <a href="http://www.mywalkgear.com/Personalized-Multiple-Sclerosis-Hero-T-Shirt-34161X.aspx?source=froogle&kw=34161X&utm_medium=feed&utm_source=googleproducts&utm_term=34161X&utm_campaign=MS+Tshirts" target="_blank">HERE</a></span><br />
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<a href="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-A_Aynv50a6E/Vr_eZ1viGHI/AAAAAAAAAK8/kuchl7bX7ko/s1600/12728864_10207008800912553_357561714239075674_n_Fotor_Collage.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-A_Aynv50a6E/Vr_eZ1viGHI/AAAAAAAAAK8/kuchl7bX7ko/s320/12728864_10207008800912553_357561714239075674_n_Fotor_Collage.jpg" width="320" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Even a portion of the t-shirt sales go to MS research.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Last link….If you want to follow A Chat with Matt on Facebook, we have a group formed <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/526487324195513/" target="_blank">HERE</a></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Just click <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/526487324195513/" target="_blank">“Join Group”</a> and we will add you!</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Now on to the blog…..</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Matt wanted to talk about how fast things change….in the blink of an eye….</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I asked him what he meant by that and he said he thinks about the last MS Walk we did, he was walking then. It has been almost 5 years since we did that walk. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Matt appreciates your support, whether it is in person or in thought. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Pictured below is Team O. in 2011 when we walked!</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">“I was walking then, but now I'm practically bed-ridden, I want people to know how quickly things can change.” </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">He said “I do my exercises now, but I wish I would have done more back then.”</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">He said “I can’t do much of anything any more.” He went on to say he knows he’s not the man he used to be, but he sure wants to be.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Matt said the more he thinks about it, it gets depressing so he tries not to dwell on it.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Time passes and things change, and he doesn’t know what the future holds but he doesn’t want anyone (medical professionals) to sugar coat it, he wants to know what will happen to him. </span><span style="font-family: 'Trebuchet MS', sans-serif;">He said he wants to be prepared and he wants his family to be prepared.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I found this quote and it is pretty accurate to what Matt O. is feeling right now.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: small;">Life changes fast. Life changes in the instant. You sit down to dinner and life as you know it ends."<span style="background-color: white;">― </span><a class="authorOrTitle" href="http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/238.Joan_Didion" style="color: #333333; text-decoration: none;">Joan Didion</a></span></h1>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">It’s not easy living with MS, it is different for everyone. Matt doesn’t want your sympathy, he wants your support, your friendship, your empathy. He wants you to know that he didn’t ask for this and more than anything he’d like to get up tomorrow morning and go to work, driving his own truck and not relying on anyone to get him anything. He is grateful for his family for being there for him. He knows it’s not easy on them either. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Matt said "Thank you" to everyone that reads and comments. He truly truly loves hearing from you all! </span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; font-weight: bold; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">“When you stand and share your story in an empowering way, your story will heal you and your story will heal somebody else.” – Iyanla Vanzant</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Writing this blog has been something that I look forward to doing and it makes my heart feel good when Matt calls and asks when we’re going to talk about the next one! He tells me what he wants to talk about, although he said “You can say whatever you want”….this is his time to share his thoughts! </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Until next time…..</span></div>
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<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6196202499743626521.post-29172043910049711502016-02-05T16:49:00.000-08:002016-02-05T16:49:29.793-08:00Things you don’t think about when you’re young and healthy…..<div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Let me start by thanking everyone that read and commented on our first blog post.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">To say that Matt was excited would be an understatement. He truly loved hearing the comments. I personally was overwhelmed by the show of love and support. Thank you!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I have started a Facebook Group that you can join and leave comments there and I know Cindy will read them to him! He called me every day to see if there were any more comments. You can join the group here:</span></div>
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<a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/526487324195513/">https://www.facebook.com/groups/526487324195513/</a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Y</span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">ou can change the notifications settings there also. This will make it easier for some people to comment, but for those without Facebook to still follow the blog. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Pictured below is Matt in the middle of part of our crazy family on Christmas Day-</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Trying out my new selfie stick.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Surrounded by the love of family! </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Matt wanted me to talk about the things you don’t think about when you’re young and healthy. After all, you don’t know what you don’t know, and he doesn’t want people to take those things for granted! </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><u>Using a Phone</u>: Yes Matt’s phone is voice activated and he can tell it to call someone, but it’s a flip phone and his finger dexterity makes it hard to open sometimes. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">He can’t really see to use a smart phone, because of his vision. (Not very smart now is it?) What we need is a smarter phone! Maybe there is something out there already, a phone that he could easily open- and be voice activated - that’s something to look into further (or invent)!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><u>Exercise!:</u> Matt said listen to the doctor because “they won’t make you do anything to hurt you”, and he said when he does his exercises he does notice a difference and it helps him through the day. He gets a lot of numbness in his hands and feet - prickly, like when your foot falls asleep — only it doesn’t go away and he can’t control it. He said the exercises help with that but it never really goes away and every few weeks he has a spell where it gets worse. He said “Just do what you can, that’s all you really can do” and I added and sometimes you have to do what you can even if you don’t really want to.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">And most importantly “Take care of yourself when you are young”, you don’t know when you won’t be able to do a simple thing- like walk.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><u>Read:</u> Loss of vision was one of the first symptoms Matt had. MS affects the optic nerve. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Matt said he can eventually focus on something in close range if he looks at it long enough; but it takes a long time. He also said he has a lot of double vision and it makes it hard to watch tv so he “just listens.” He can’t read anything any more because it’s too small and he can’t get it in focus. He said just sitting and talking to me, he could see me really well, but a few feet further away, he couldn’t make out who it was. I told him I once heard on a talk show that if you put vaseline on goggles and tried to see through them, that is what it’s like for someone with MS to see like. I asked him if that was accurate and he said it was. Read, because you don’t know how much you’ll miss it. Not just reading words, but music too, and if you never heard Matt sing….you’re missing a real treat! Along with retiring from work, he retired from the church choir because he couldn’t read the music. He still knows a lot of words to songs and he still sings in church when he hears a familiar song - and he still has that beautiful voice!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><u>Independence</u>: When you are young you don’t think much about hopping up off the couch and going outside on a beautiful day. Matt said he “loves to sit outside or in the garage.”</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">He knows that he can’t do that without assistance because of the risk of his falling. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">He’s already broken a hip and an ankle after a fall. (Both required surgery and extended hospital stays) Not that this is the time of year to sit outside, but it’s one of the things he likes doing. He said “you don’t think about that when you’re young and healthy.”</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><u>Navigation:</u> You don’t notice how many places are NOT handicap accessible until you travel around in a wheelchair. Matt said it’s hard and he thinks of “all the bathrooms I remodeled, but didn’t think about a wheelchair.” </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">(I notice in my own house how we’re not really handicap accessible) </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">You can add things like ramps, but in an older house, an older bathroom- it just wasn’t set up to make room for a wheelchair! </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Parking in a handicap spot too, Matt said sometimes even a handicap spot doesn’t leave enough room for Cindy to navigate, let alone enough room to get him in and out of.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">"Things you don’t think about when you’re young and healthy……”</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">As I sit and type this, I think of the impact Matt has had on my life. When I was in junior high he told me to go out for student council and I did and I was voted in! In high school he told me to join Youth In Government and I did, it was one of the best experiences of my life. (I’m not sure they even do that any more, but it was a great program where the students ran the government for the weekend at the State house in Columbus.) He didn’t know it (or maybe he did) but he helped to develop the leader in me. I wanted to be like him. He was so well liked, so popular and really paved the way for me. Now he did things to embarrass me too, like when I was in the 7th grade and I had an extremely huge crush on an older boy. At the basketball games they used to rope off the court between games and at half time, he was holding the rope and I was walking by at the same time this guy was. Matt stopped me and the boy and he said “Hey, This is my little sister, Kellie” and while I wanted to crawl under the floor from embarrassment, I was excited at the same time. Always looking out for his little sister. (Yet he made me ride the bus because it wasn’t cool to drive his little sister to school….) </span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">We were young and carefree and never in a million years would we have thought we’d be talking about things like navigating in a wheelchair or me typing a blog because he couldn’t see to do it any longer. Matt is a great guy, trapped inside his own body now and I am honored to share his stories with you all. </span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6196202499743626521.post-3972380852291687002016-01-31T13:56:00.000-08:002016-01-31T14:06:20.393-08:00Living with MSLet me just get this out of the way. MS (Multiple Sclerosis) stinks!<br />
This blog is for my brother Matt O. who has MS.<br />
He said he wants to write a book, I told him I didn’t think I could write a book but a blog, I could certainly do that. So between my sisters and I, this weekend we chatted with Matt and took some notes to share Matt’s voice- because he still has that, even if he can’t write it down for you.<br />
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A little background, Matt is my older brother. We come from a family of six. In order:<br />
Dorene, Paul, Robin, Todd, Matt and Kellie (That’s me). Our father passed away in 1983 of lung cancer and our mother passed away in 2010 from pancreatic cancer. (Cancer also, stinks!)<br />
Matt is married to Cindy for 32 years, and they have four children, Katie (married to Ryan), Joey, Andrew and Julia and with not just one, but two grandchildren on the way. <br />
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Matt has been living with MS for some time, I don’t remember exactly when he was diagnosed, I know my mom was still alive and I know they suspected it years before but was never diagnosed.<br />
His first symptoms were his failing vision. I remember the day he couldn’t get his drivers license renewed, it was on his birthday and my mom called to tell me. He cried. I remember going to see him that day. He still worked for a time after that, his buddy picked him up for work.<br />
Work became harder and harder as the vision and his balance deteriorated. He medically retired from Ford. He is a pipe fitter. (And one of the hardest workers I ever did know)<br />
It took him three times to receive disability benefits although he can’t walk without assistance and now is mostly in a wheelchair and he can’t see well enough to really do anything. He isn’t completely blind, but by the legal definition, blind.<br />
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Matt gets really frustrated with his illness and this week was especially hard. I don’t know that any “thing” made it worse, he said the “illness is just catching up with me”. <br />
He said he feels useless and sometimes wishes he just wasn’t here. That’s hard for a lot of us to hear.<br />
He just wants to contribute, but he doesn’t feel like he does. He knows that we all have our lives and jobs and kids, etc….etc… etc… “You have a life, I get that”, he told me. And while he fights this illness my life, your life, it goes on…we keep moving forward a day at a time but for Matt, he’s stuck in neutral. He can’t go anywhere (without help), he can’t read if you send him a card, he can’t write because his dexterity has deteriorated to the point where he even needs help to eat. He said it’s embarrassing to drop things all the time and sometimes it’s easier not to eat. <br />
He said he still has a brain, and he just wants to talk. So we listened. <br />
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Matt said he wants people to know he is not lazy. "I really just CAN’T Do what I used to do."<br />
(I remember once he told me he felt like a total failure, as if he asked for this….)<br />
But he knows it’s not his fault, it’s not anyone’s fault, but he is still frustrated and tired.<br />
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Matt loves to talk to older people, because he said “They have done it all and they have something to contribute” and “I just like to listen”. He remembers things from yesteryears, that even I don’t remember. He remembers people, even if he doesn’t always remember faces, he remembers names. <br />
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This disease is hard and it affects everyone differently and even though to look at Matt O. you think he looks ok….he’s not. You can’t see what MS does to a person like you can see what happens to someone with a physical injury or bruises, but he is bruised on the inside and it’s hard to explain.<br />
He knows he doesn’t always say the right things, but his brain still works.<br />
And so does his voice and Matt O…. I can listen and tell your story.<br />
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<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com13